342 Interesting, Important, Unimportant, Thought Provoking, Stupid, Funny, Inspiring, and Nonsensical Quotes I Have Collected When Bored
*please note every effort is made to get the correct credit for each quote, but sometimes the internet (and people) are inaccurate
1. Every moment you live in the past is a moment you waste in the present. Tony Robbins
2. I know that I do not know. Socrates
3. If you understand everything you must be misinformed. Japanese Proverb
4. Your relationship with yourself sets the tone for every other relationship you have. Robert Holden
5. Cupcakes are muffins that believed in miracles.
6. Feelings are just visitors. Let them come and go. Mooji
7. The roaring lion kills no prey. Nigerian proverb
8. Thoughts are like arrows, once released they strike their mark. Guard them well or one day you may be your own victim. Navajo Proverb
9. The longer we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their power to harm us. Voltaire
10. Obsessed is a word that the lazy use to describe the dedicated.
11. Doubt kills more dreams than failure ever will. Suzy Kassem
12. Incredible change happens in your life when you decide to take control of what you do have power over instead of craving control over what you don’t. Steve Maraboli
13. Happiness is not the absence of problems, it’s the ability to deal with them.
14. The tiger and the lion may be more powerful but the wolf does not perform in the circus.
15. I was quiet, but I was not blind. Jane Austen
16. Don’t raise your voice. Improve your argument.
17. The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and the day you find out why. Mark Twain
18. The first step towards getting somewhere is to decide that you are not going to stay where you are.
19. Some women choose to follow men. And some women choose to follow their dream. If you’re wondering which way to go, remember that your career will never wake up and tell you it doesn’t love you anymore.
20. Write drunk. Edit sober. Ernest Hemingway
21. What the caterpillar calls the end, the rest of the world calls a butterfly. Lao Tzu
22. I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work. Thomas Edison
23. Lead with your strengths, not your weaknesses.
24. Never waste a minute thinking about people you don’t like. Dwight D. Eisenhower
25. Nothing diminishes anxiety faster than action. Walter Anderson
26. Do not seek to follow in the footsteps of others. Instead, seek what they sought. Matsuo Busho
27. Sometimes the good things fall apart so better things can fall together. Marilyn Monroe
28. When they go low, we go high. Michelle Obama
29. We knew the world would not be the same. Few People laughed. Few people cried, most people were silent. I remembered the line for the Hindu scripture, the Bhagavad-Gita…, “Now I am become Death, the destroyer of worlds”. I suppose we all thought that, one way or another. Robert Oppenheimer
30. I can accept failure, everyone fails at something. But I cannot accept not trying. Michael Jordan
31. It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not weakness, that is life. Jean Luc Picard
32. Don’t underestimate the value of doing nothing. Of just going along, listening to all the things you can’t hear, and not bothering. Winnie the Pooh
33. Whenever you are confronted with an opponent, conquer him with love. Gandhi
34. The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away. Pablo Picasso
35. Remember that not getting what you want in life is sometimes a wonderful stroke of luck. Dalai Lama
36. You cannot imagine the immensity of the f**ks I do not give.
37. The man on top of the mountain did not fall there. Vincent Lombardi
38. Failure is the opportunity to begin again. This time more intelligently. Henry Ford
39. Inner peace begins the moment you choose not to allow another person or event control your emotions. Perna Chadron
40. Forgive others not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve peace. Jonathan Lockwood Huie
41. The work you do while you procrastinate is probably the work you should be doing for the rest of your life. Jessica Hoche
42. Be very careful what you think. Your thoughts run your life.
43. In times of change, learners inherit the Earth, while the learned find themselves beautifully equipped to deal with a world that no longer exists. Eric Hoffer
44. Do not wish for an easy life. Wish for the strength to endure a difficult one. Bruce Lee
45. It doesn’t matter where you start. Only that you begin. Robin Sharma
46. Unless you try to do something beyond what you have already mastered, you will never grow. Ralph Waldo Emerson
47. First they ignore you. Then they laugh at you. Then they fight you. Then you win. Nicholas Klein
48. If it’s both terrifying and amazing, then you should definitely pursue it. Erada
49. Life is ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you react to it. Charles Swindoll
50. The problem is that the intelligent people are full of doubt, while the stupid people are full of confidence. Charles Bukowski
51. The what-ifs and the should-haves will eat your brain. John O’Callaghan
52. No matter how big your house is, how recent your car is, or how big your bank account is. Our graves will always be the same size. Stay humble.
53. Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. John Wooden
54. The biggest communication problem is we don’t listen to understand, we listen to reply.
55. You develop instant global consciousness, a people orientation, an intense dissatisfaction with the state of the world, and a compulsion to do something about it. From out there on the moon, international politics looks so petty. You want to grab a politician by the scruff of the neck and drag him a quarter of a million miles out and say, “look at that, you son of a bitch.” Edgar Mitchell
56. Not my circus. Not my monkeys. Polish Proverb
57. Karma has no deadline.
58. Having plans sounds like a good idea until you have to put on clothes and leave your house.
59. Friday, my second favorite F-word.
60. Tact is the ability to tell someone to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip. Winston Churchill
61. It’s okay to love someone you hate. You don’t have to forgive someone to miss them.
62. Fear, uncertainty, and discomfort are your compasses toward growth.
63. Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes. Oscar Wilde
64. When we give up on our dreams, we die while still alive. Robin Sharma
65. Showing off is the fool’s idea of glory. Bruce Lee
66. Just the fact that we don’t know our due date on death should be enough motivation to live every day to your highest potential.
67. Now and then it’s good to pause in our pursuit of happiness, and just be happy. Guillarme Apollinaire
68. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. The only way to do great work is to love what you do. Steve Jobs
69. How far you go in life depends on your being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving, and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in your life, you will have been all of these. George Washington Carver
70. A good laugh and a long sleep are the two best cures for anything. Irish Proverb
71. Everything in moderation. Including moderation.
72. Life, too, is like that. You live it forward, but understand it backward.
73. We’re only given a little spark of madness. Don’t lose it.
74. For every minute you are angry you lose sixty seconds of happiness. Ralph Waldo Emerson
75. An eye for an eye will make the whole world blind. Gandhi
76. The weak can never forgive. Forgiveness is an attribute of the strong. Gandhi
77. Having the maturity to know that sometimes silence is more powerful than having the last word. Thema Davis
78. When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. Lao Tzu
79. Whether you think you can or think you can’t you’re right. Henry Ford
80. Time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time. John Lennon
81. Optimism is a happiness magnet. If you stay positive, good things and good people will be drawn to you. Mary Lou Retton
82. Idealistic as it may sound, altruism should be the driving force in business, not just competition and a desire for wealth. Dalai Lama
83. The only way of finding the limits of the possible is by going beyond them into the impossible. Arthur C Clarke
84. The only way to learn it is to do it. Archimedes
85. Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does. William James
86. The real question is not whether life exists after death. The real question is whether you are alive before death. Oshe
87. People call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that distinguish me from a doormat. Rebecca West
88. Speak when you are angry and you’ll make the best speech you’ll ever regret. Dr. Laurence J. Peter
89. The real measure of your wealth is how much you’d be worth if you lost all your money.
90. Our prime purpose in this life is to help others, and if you can’t help them, at least don’t hurt them. Dalai Lama
91. Make sure your worst enemy doesn’t live between your two ears. Laird Hamilton
92. The cure to boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity. Dorothy Parker
93. A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity, the optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. Winston Churchill
94. One day you will wake up and there won’t be any more time to do the things you’ve always wanted. Do it now. Paulo Coelho
95. Let go of those who bring you down and surround yourself with those who bring out the best in you.
96. Life begins at the end of your comfort zone. Neal Donald Walsch
97. Keep your heels, head, and standards high. Coco Chanel
98. Be humble, you could be wrong.
99. Never be afraid to try something new because life gets boring when you stay within the limits of what you already know.
100. Of course it’s hard. It’s supposed to be hard. If it were easy, everybody would do it. Hard is what makes it great. A League of Their Own
101. Allow yourself to be a beginner. No one starts off being excellent.
102. The quieter you become, the more you can hear.
103. Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it. The time will pass anyway.
104. You don’t have to have it all figured out to move forward
105. If you hear a voice within you say, you cannot paint. Then by all means, paint, and that voice will be silenced. Vincent Van Gogh
106. Create something today, even if it sucks.
107. Use what talents you possess. The woods would be very silent if no birds sang there except those that sang best. Henry Van Dyke
108. Respect yourself enough to walk away from anything that no longer serves you, grows you, or makes you happy. Robert Tew
109. The wisest mind has something yet to learn. George Santayana
110. Within you is a stillness and a sanctuary to which you can retreat at any time and be yourself. Herman Hesse
111. Life is so damn short. For f**k sake, just do what makes you happy.
112. Yes, I’ve made mistakes. Life didn’t come with instructions.
113. I always wonder why birds stay in the same place when they can fly anywhere on the Earth. Then I ask myself the same question. Harun Yahya
114. There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth, not going all the way, and not starting. Buddha
115. There is no way to happiness. Happiness is the way. Buddha
116. Holding on to anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die. Buddha.
117. Nowadays people know the price of everything and the value of nothing. Oscar Wilde
118. Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.
119. If you never did, you should. These things are fun and fun is good. Dr Seuss
120. The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem.
121. The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now. Chinese Proverb
122. The only person you are destined to become is the person you decide to be. Ralph Waldo Emerson
123. Don’t let someone who gave up on their dream talk you out of going after yours. Zig Ziglar
124. Expectation is the root of all heartache.
125. You can never make the same mistake twice, because the second time you make it, it’s not a mistake, it’s a choice.
126. Pour yourself a drink, put on some lipstick, and pull yourself together. Liz Taylor
127. The best things in life are free. The second best are very expensive. Coco Chanel
128. Every accomplishment begins with the decision to try.
129. I can’t stop drinking the coffee. If I stop drinking the coffee, I stop doing the standing and the walking and the words putting into sentence doing.
130. Adventure may hurt you, but monotony will kill you.
131. If you are not willing to look stupid, nothing great is ever going to happen to you. Dr. Gregory House
132. The trouble is, you think you have time.
133. The only way to get through life is to laugh your way through it. You either have to laugh or cry. I prefer to laugh. Crying gives me a headache. Marjorie Pay Hinckley
134. Sometimes you find yourself in the middle of nowhere, and sometimes, in the middle of nowhere you find yourself.
135. Don’t waste your time looking back on what you’ve lost. Move on, for life is not mean to be traveled backward.
136. You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough. Mae West
137. In three words I can sum up everything I know about life: It. Goes. On. Robert Frost
138. Life is about using the whole box of crayons.
139. Doing what you like is freedom. Liking what you do is happiness.
140. Being fearless isn’t the point. That’s impossible. It’s learning how to control your fear, and how to be free from it. That’s the point.
141. Some people are old at 18 and some are young at 90. Time is a concept that humans created. Yoko Ono
142. I like nonsense. It wakes up the brain cells. Dr. Seuss
143. If plan A fails, remember you have 25 letters left.
144. Don’t let yesterday take up too much of today. Will Rogers
145. Victory is sweetest when you’ve known defeat. Malcolm Forbes
146. A ship in harbor is safe, but that’s not what ships are built for. John Shedd
147. I never look back darling. It distracts from the now. Edna Mode
148. Fine doesn’t mean fine. The scale goes: great, good, okay, not okay, I hate you, fine.
149. There is no such thing as bad ideas. Just poorly executed awesome ideas.
150. When you are content to be simply yourself and don’t compare or compete, everyone will respect you. Lao Tzu
151. In any given moment we have two options, to step forward into growth or back into safety. Abraham Maslow
152. If you stumble, make it part of the dance.
153. Just because you’re trash doesn’t mean you can’t do great things. It’s called garbage CAN not garbage CANNOT.
154. Humans are 90% water, basically cucumbers with anxiety.
155. An G-d said “love your enemy”, and I obeyed Him, and loved myself. Khalil Gibron
156. It’s a job that’s never started that takes the longest to finish. J.R.R. Tolkien
157. Never underestimate the ability of a small group of dedicated people to change the world. Indeed it is the only thing that ever has.
158. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift, which is why we call it the present. Bil Keane
159. The penalty for procrastination is the loss of hopes and dreams. Tai Lopez
160. Always remember the future comes one day at a time. Dean Acheson
161. Do more of what makes you happy. Carmel McConnell
162. There’s a thin line between confidence and arrogance, it’s call humility. Confidence smiles. Arrogance smirks.
163. Pride is concerned with who is right. Humility is concerned with what is right. Ezra Taft Benson
164. No one has ever made himself great by showing how small someone else is. Irvin Himmel
165. There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self. Ernest Hemingway
166. None are so empty as those who are full of themselves. Benjamin Whichcote
167. Everyone you will ever meet knows something you don’t. Bill Nye
168. In the end only three things matter; how much you loved, how gently you lived, and how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you. Buddha
169. Always be the dumbest person in the room.
170. True humility is being able to accept criticisms as graciously as we accept compliments. Sabrina Newby
171. A true leader is one who is humble enough to admit their mistakes.
172. I am very cautious of people whose actions don’t match their words.
173. Transformation is often more about unlearning than learning. Richard Rohr
174. A good deed dies when it is spoken about. Saudi Proverb
175. I like people that make me laugh, make me think, and make me coffee.
176. The greatest victory has been to be able to live with myself, to accept my shortcomings. I’m a long way from the human being I’d like to be. But I’ve decided I’m not so bad after all. Audrey Hepburn
177. An amateur practices until he can play it correctly, a professional practices until he can’t play it incorrectly.
178. We thought we hit rock bottom, then someone knocked from below. Russian Proverb
179. The darkest places in hell are reserved for those who maintain their neutrality in times of moral crisis. Dante Alighien
180. Measure what’s important; don’t make important what you can’t measure. Robert McNamara
181. If you feel oppressed, wake up at 4am, nobody there to oppress you.
182. You’re not supposed to do what you’re supposed to do. Mark Fenske
183. Everything is story. Story is everything.
184. Mediocrity sabotages.
185. Once or twice in every generation a line is crossed so egregiously that where you stood on the issue will forever define you. Kara Vallow
186. I’m not upset that you lied to me, I’m upset that from now on I can’t believe you. Friedrich Nietzsche
187. A person who never made a mistake never tried anything new. Einstein
188. A man often meets his destiny on the very road he takes to avoid it.
189. The world will not be destroyed by those who do evil, but by those who watch them without doing anything. Einstein
190. Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of this is the beginning of wisdom. Theodore Isaac Rubin
191. The world is moving so fast that the man who says it can’t be done is generally interrupted by the man doing it. Elbert Hubbard
192. Never look back unless you are planning to go that way. Henry David Thoreau
193. Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it
194. It’s a helluva start, being able to recognize what makes you happy. Lucille Ball
195. If I quit now, I will soon be back to where I started; and when I started I was desperately wishing to be where I am now.
196. You cannot start the next chapter of your life if you keep rereading the last one. Michael McMillan
197. One’s destination is never a place, but rather a new way of looking at things. Henry Milller
198. The way to get started is to quit talking and begin doing. Walt Disney
199. The future depends on what we do in the present. Gandhi
200. You have power over your mind, not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength. Marcus Aurelius
201. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don’t lose faith. Steve Jobs
202. Believe that you can and you’re halfway there. Theodore Roosevelt
203. Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strengths. Arnold S.
204. Success is the ability to go from failure to failure without losing your enthusiasm. Winston Churchill
205. You cannot protect yourself from sadness without protecting yourself from happiness. Jonathan Safran Foer
206. The biggest room in the world is the room for improvement.
207. Destiny is not a matter of chance; it is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved. William Jennings Bryan
208. Launch and learn. Everything is progress. Danielle Caporte
209. Nothing is so fatiguing as the eternal hanging on of an uncompleted task. William James
210. A year from now you will wish you had started today. Karen Lamb
211. There is real magic in enthusiasm, it spells the difference between mediocrity and accomplishment. Norman Vince Peale
212. Waste no more time arguing about what a good person should be. Be one. Marcus Aurelius
213. What worries you, masters you.
214. People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel. Maya Angelou
215. Sometimes the good things fall apart so better things can fall together. Marilyn Monroe
216. Success is something you attract by the person you become. Jim Rohn
217. The thing that is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself. Anna Quindlen
218. You are confined only by the walls you build yourself. Andrew Murphy
219. Sitting quietly, doing nothing, spring comes, and the grass grows by itself. Matsuo Basho
220. If most of us are ashamed of shabby clothes and shoddy furniture, let us be more ashamed of shabby ideas and shoddy philosophies. Einstein
221. Believe in yourself. Under-confidence leads to a self-fulfilling prophecy that you are not good enough for your work. Dr. Raspleen
222. If you cannot do great things, do small things in a great way. Napolean Hiu
223. What you do matters, but why you do it matters much more.
224. I know not with what weapons WWIII will be fought, but WWIV will be fought with sticks and stones. Albert Einstein
225. If you wish to see the truth, hold no opinions.
226. I will not live the same year 90 times and call it life. I want to meet new people, learn new things and go to places I’ve never been. Brooke Hampton
227. Dude, suckin’ at something is the first step to being sorta good at something.
228. Our attitude toward life determines life’s attitude toward us. Earl Nightengale
229. The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure that you seek. Joseph Campbell
230. To be free is not merely to cast off one’s chains, but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others. Nelson Mandela
231. Never get into a fight with a pig. You’ll both get dirty, but the pig likes it.
232. Everything is copy.
233. People don’t like brands, they like themselves.
234. Don’t allow your rituals to become ruts. Todd Henry
235. There is no person living who isn’t capable of doing more than they think they can do. Henry Ford
236. There is no sadness that can’t be cured by breakfast food. Ron Swanson
237. Necessity is the mother of invention.
238. It’s ok, we can just brand the apocalypse. Joe Baumgardner
239. It’s kind of fun to do the impossible. Walt Disney.
240. Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.
241. We are all faced with a series of great opportunities brilliantly disguised as impossible situations. Charles Swindoll
242. The path to wisdom is paved with humility. Tim Fargo
243. All you owe your enemies is success.
244. Don’t be intimidated by what you don’t know. That can be your greatest strength and ensure that you do things differently from everyone else. Sara Blakely
245. I don’t get why people say LA doesn’t have seasons. We always have a beautiful spring, then of course pilot, summer, and awards. Danielle Weisberg
246. The good thing about science is that it’s true whether or not you believe in it. Dr. Neil Degrasse Tyson
247. Nutrition labels should come with a “what if I ate the whole damn thing” section.
248. Be brave. We’re all gonna get fired in the end by people or time. Jeff Goodby
249. There are approximately 422,000 words in the English language. Some of the most powerful are the ones you use to talk to yourself.
250. Why do people ask how’s work? Like, work is work, I would rather be in Europe right now, naked on a yacht, while destroying my liver, but, here I am.
251. You are stronger than your challenges and your challenges are making you stronger. Karen Salmansohn
252. Don’t let perfection become procrastination. Do it now. Danielle LaPorte
253. You take your life in your own hands, and what happens? A terrible thing, no one to blame. Erica Jong
254. Children are wonderfully confident in their own imaginations. Most of us lose this confidence as we grow up. Sir Ken Robinson
255. Make the plan. Execute the plan. Expect the plan to go off the rails. Ditch the plan.
256. Don’t get mad. Get everything.
257. Listen to the naysayers, not because they’re right, but because it’s fuel. Kara Goldin
258. No matter how much I ear, there’s always room for dessert. Dessert doesn’t go to the stomach. Dessert goes to the heart.
259. Don’t ask kids what they want to be when they grow up, but rather what problems do they want to solve. This changes the conversation from who do I want to work for, to what do I need to learn to be able to do that. Jaimie Casap
260. Science can tell you how to clone a Tyrannosaurus Rex. Humanities can tell you why this might be a bad idea.
261. “It’s just a book!” and hell is just a sauna.
262. Onion rings are just vegetable donuts.
263. No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. The Princess Diaries
264. So what have we learned today, ladies and gentlemen? Never, EVER, under ANY circumstance f**k with Beyoncé.
265. Both genders should know who to cook because neither feminism nor sexism are going to help when you’re hungry.
266. You can’t demand service while simultaneously degrading those who provide it for you.
267. I’ve passed beyond stressed, beyond hysteria, into the grey misty indifference of complete shutdown of all but emergency services in my brain.
268. It’s a lot easier to stop eating carbs once you’ve come to terms with living a joyless life full of anger and sadness.
269. Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does. William James
270. It’s not the years in your life that count. It’s the life in your years. Abraham Lincoln
271. No matter how hard the past, you can always begin again. Buddha
272. Of all the things that can boost emotions, motivation, and perceptions during a workday, the single most important is making progress in meaningful work. Teresa Amabile
273. It’s not the daily increase, but daily decrease. Hack away at the unessential. Bruce Lee
274. Don’t envy what people have, emulate what they did to have it. Tim Fargo
275. Progress lies not in enhancing what is, but in advancing toward what will be. Khalil Gibson
276. Whenever you see a successful business, someone once made a courageous decision. Peter Drucker
277. What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything.
278. If you don’t prioritize your life, someone else will. Greg McKeown
279. If you find yourself constantly trying to prove your worth to someone, you have already forgotten your value.
280. If hell is other people, airports are purgatory.
281. Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.
282. If they don’t give you a seat at the table, bring a folding chair. Shirley Chisholm
283. Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
284. I’ve learned that being an adult consists mostly of just trying not to have an epic meltdown every day.
285. Sometimes you eat the bear, and, well, sometimes the bear eats you.
286. That just life, or maybe, there’s proof of chaos, magic, and synchronicity in the universe.
287. Without the truth we have no foundation from which to resist
288. You go in with logic first, then strap a unicorn on it.
289. Art direction is like the dark arts.
290. Imagination is more important than knowledge. Knowledge is limited. Imagination encircles the world. Einstein
291. Things may come to those who wait, but only the things left by those who hustle.
292. Each day wake up and ask what will make you feel most alive that day.
293. A moment of self-compassion can change your entire day. A string of such moments can change your entire life.
294. Be weird. Your strangeness is your magic. Parker Lewis
295. We either make ourselves miserable or we make ourselves strong. The amount of work is the same. Carlos Castaneda
296. People may hear your words, but they feel your attitude. John C. Maxwell
297. I fear this will have shattered any productivity I had left in my life.
298. I would like to see a therapist because I feel like they, like, have to sit there and listen to me, like, today I saw a dog.
299. I’ve overstepped my tea and now I’m upset.
300. We’re two halved of a whole idiot.
301. Well, apparently rock bottom has a basement.
302. Until you cross the bridge of your insecurities, you can’t begin to explore your possibilities. Tim Fargo
303. I am strong because I have been weak, I am fearless because I have been afraid, I am wise because I have been foolish.
304. Nothing is impossible, the word itself says “I’m Possible.” Audrey Hepburn
305. What you do today is important because you are exchanging a day of your life for it.
306. Your brand is your company’s soul, if you company has a soul.
307. Just so we’re clear, the Grinch never really hated Christmas. He hated people, which is fair.
308. I think the reason we are born with two hands is so we can pet two dogs at once.
309. I feel like daylight savings time could be the final straw for a lot of us this year.
310. Stop complaining about your life, there are people out there who are literally allergic to dogs.
311. The optimist thinks this is the best of all possible worlds. The pessimist fears it is true.
312. Both the man of science and the man of action live always at the edge of mystery, surrounded by it.
313. No man should escape our universities without knowing how little he knows.
314. Some days I amaze myself, other days I look for my phone while I’m talking on it.
315. No flakey friends, only flakey pastries.
316. Being an adult is 90% worrying about money and 10% spending money you don’t have on treats because you worried a lot this week.
317. If we’re all gonna die one day, then why would I go on a juice cleanse.
318. Do sharks complain about Monday? No. They’re up early. Biting stuff, chasing shit, being scary—reminding everyone they’re a f**king shark.
319. A recent study shows that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.
320. The best way to predict the future is to create it. Peter Drucker
321. Think lightly of yourself and deeply of the world. Miyamoto Musashi
322. Being aware of a single shortcoming within yourself is far more useful than being aware of a thousand in someone else. Dalai Lama
323. The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score.
324. The world needs dreamers and the world need does. But above all, the world needs dreamers who do. Sarah Ban Breathrach
325. Since you make evil or good by your own thoughts, it is your ruling of your thoughts which proves to be your principle concern. William James
326. People who are unable to motivate themselves must be content with mediocrity no matter how impressive their talents. Andrew Carnegie
327. Always walk through life as if you have something new to learn and you will. Vernon Howard
328. Good judgement comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment. Will Rogers
329. The best teachers are those who show you where to look, but don’t tell you what to see.
330. Anyone who stops learning is old. Henry Ford
331. It takes as much energy to wish as it does to plan. Eleanor Roosevelt
332. All things are difficult before they are easy. Thomas Fuller
333. Never bend your head. Always hold it high. Look the world straight in the face. Helen Keller
334. Worry is an unhealthy and destructive mental habit. Norman Vincent Peale
335. Soon is not as good as now. Seth Godin
336. The brain is like a muscle. When it is in use we feel good. Understanding is joyous. Carl Sagan
337. There is nothing so useless as doing efficiently that which should not be done at all. Peter Drucker
338. One who knows all the answers has not been asked all the questions. Confucius
339. Failure is success if you learn from it. To be wronged is nothing unless you continue to remember it. Confucius
340. Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy. Isaac Newton
341. A hero is one who knows how to hang on for one minute longer. Norwegian Proverb
342. I bury hatches, but I keep maps of where I put them.